Avoiding Intimacy? Avoidance Behavior 101
It’s so easy to spot someone who is avoiding intimacy. Or is it?
Most of us think of avoidance as an outright refusal to participate in an activity or endeavor. But if we really take a look at avoidance, we find it can be cloaked so many ways.
We make ourselves busy. We surround ourselves with others and delve into their lives. We “work”. We over commit. We get too tired. We get too wired. We travel. We get sick. These are clever techniques to avoid the things that matter at home.
Exploring the world is a wonderful thing, but there’s no place like home, and if we do not do the work to maintain a healthy foundation with our partner, some day we may come home and find our cozy nest empty; even if our partner is physically there.
Avoiding that which makes us uncomfortable is human, and as we mature, we tend to get more creative in how we avoid confrontation. So, lover beware. Be careful not to let too much time go by without stopping to check in with your partner. Set private time aside each week for each other. Share your thoughts and ask your partner about theirs. Listen. Shut off the phone for a few hours. Bond.
Making time for yourself and your partner is just as important as keeping your professional associations and commitments, so be mindful when creating your mental list of priorities. Remember, at the end of the day you can’t hug your job.
Yours in the Tao,